Category Archives: Blame it, Claim it, Change It

‘Blame it, Name it, Change it’ is a way to engage right now with an issue you need to resolve. 

Blame it. The media, money, the GOP or Democratic Party or _____ is producing an election of lesser of evil or candidates that will create four more years of fear and hate.  People will pick Hillary because they hate Trump, or Trump because the fear Hillary.  If Hillary wins the hate will be on Clinton legacy hate and fear of losing power to women and minorities. After all we just had eight years of Obama hate.  If Trump wins his racist, bully, ‘I know how to run a business therefore a country and don’t question me’ will be met with resistance worldwide.  If Bernie wins he will be hated for his socialist ideas that actually exist and work in other countries.  If Cruz wins we will get more manipulation in favor of the 1%, less real change for the entire country in every vector.   The election is not about leading the country but who can produce the most money and manipulate the American people.

Name it.  I found this quote by Edward Morrow, “When the politicians complain that TV turns their proceedings into a circus, it should be make plain that the circus was already there, and that TV has merely demonstrated that not all the performers are well trained.”  The media, the election process, our government, are all reflections of us.  What we have or have not paid attention too. What is coming up to be healed and changed is showing us in what is broken- or not serving us.  These things did not just happen, we built them, we supported them, and we bought into them.  Consciously or unconsciously, proactively, through ignorance or apathy for whatever reason.  They are a reflection of what we need to change and where we need to go.  How long we stay here is up to us.  The more we ignore it, expect someone else to fix it as if we have no ownership in the collective, the longer we will wallow in it and even repeat it.  . These things are not    anymore (from the last century).  Their time has come, they need to break and be rebuilt new paradigms.

Change it.  When the government is afraid of the people it creates policy and systems that serve the people. To return to leadership that represents the collective, not a sector either in support or by suppression and discrimination, we must unite. Recognize our common-unity.  Look for ways to end division and separation in every moment of every day.  It starts at home and in our neighborhoods with questioning our own beliefs and actions that result in division and separation.  We all do it, we all have to stop.  We have to let the media, money and leaders know we mean business.  We are in charge and must take that charge. We all have something to give others, it is time to define our individual success by the success of the whole. We either all arrive on shore together or all of our individual ships will sink, it is a matter of time.

When the people are afraid of the government, they believe they must arm themselves, isolate themselves and create more division and separation.  Which breeds more violence, corruption, suffering, drama and trauma for all, even those who believe they are insulated.   The more you have the more you have to loose and thus the harder you hang on, dig in and separate from the whole.  Our abundance was provided to give not to hoard.

People are voicing and participating—and we must do that in a way that brings us together, not more separation.  While it seems so, this is not an election of angry white men fearing for what has already happened, the loss of their reign.  They can try and hang on to what is already gone and never was sustainable.  Their suffering is their choice.  Let us not make it ours.  The rest of us are busy building what is new, what includes the whole, as we understand the golden egg is only there if we take care of the goose.

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Blame it. Being and ex basketball player and watching basketball games here in March madness, this comes up. Yes referees make bad calls, no doubt. In high school we used to joke the girls got all the refs in training. Referees are human, they will make bad calls.  I stewed in calls in high school and fouled out many a game.  I don’t know who picked Villanova in the men’s NCAA Final Four Division 1 to win it, but they scored if they did. It was a crazy unpredictable bracket this year with talent spread out among many teams and whoever executed on game day won in many cases.

Claim It.  I will never forget what a wise coach told me.  That a referee never makes or breaks a game. If it comes down to one call then we didn’t do enough of something right.  Defense, offense, execution, turnovers, etc.  Ever see a player miss a shot and then turn around and foul almost right away?  I have done that, an emotional foul.  It is true that playing sports is more mental than physical.  Most anyone can learn the physical and even excel but few master the mental concentration.  Especially when things are not going well.  That is what execution in sports means, getting and staying in physical shape, doing the mental preparation and then staying with the plan during the game, while adjusting and willing to make courageous calls when needed.

Change It. It never felt good to blame a ref. It was me who I was mad at.  Me for not performing the best I new I could. I got lazy.  So, when I blame others for a bad call at work, a marginal decision, I can remember that is just mirror to what I need to work on to improve my game.

Submit your Blame It, Name It, Change It

Blame it.  It is so easy to get on the Donald Trump “I can’t believe this is happening, this is ludicrous” band wagon.  And we should give voice to disrespect, childish behavior, racisms, deceit, manipulation, hate and abuse of power.  Donald Trump is definitely breaking rules and breaking systems.  He is not someone I am proud of, would want to know or take home to my dog, much less my mom or family, even the members I don’t like very much.

Name it.  I refuse to give that man my energy, unlike the media who cannot help themselves. Much like I was with candy as a child.  I also refuse to live in fear.  I am not going to be afraid of him or for my country as I know fear only reaps fear.  I used to rant and rave and say I hated George W Bush.  Now, I sounded then, like people who hate Obama or Hillary sound now, I never want to be like that.  There is no conversation, no room to find our common ground.  Fear does not generate solutions, never will never does, all it does is foster and fuel more contraction, pain and suffering and broken systems.

Besides, anyone who really believes our entire country rests on the shoulders of one person, is short circuiting reality.  If you are going to get excited or pissed and the President, then you have to get as excited and pissed about the process to elect them, about Congress and Senate and Judicial arms of government.  You have to actually understand how government works and its role.

Breaking things down into black and white serves no one but media and sensationalism propaganda shows that call themselves news.  The question is not big or small or no government, the question is what role it plays in creating and protecting society.  It means facing our collective shadow that we have not paid full price for where we are as a country and the bill is due.  We built what we have today in part by courage, ingenuity, perseverance and resourcefulness.

We also built what we have today by extermination (of peoples, nations, animals, rights, etc.), repressing and denial of rights, social and environmental injustice, bullying, helping other countries in the name of service but really at the expense their expense for our gain (win/lose) to name a few.  These shadows are coming up now to be healed.  They are a reflection of the paradigms or beliefs that no longer serve us anymore (from the last century).  Their time has come, they need to break and be rebuilt new paradigms.

Change it.  Donald Trump is just a symbol of the unhealthy masculine in our country that needs to be healed.  I wish it were not true, but it is.  This country is still asleep (minus pods of people who are not, but are not yet the dominate voice).  Awakening is painful.  Anyone who thinks we can “return” to days of yesterday, power wise, economic, socially, etc. are ignoring reality. The past is not only over, it was built on an illusion that many are attached too.  The more you have (power or money) the more you have to lose or think you do.

This country is not ready for the ideas of Bernie Sanders, never mind those ideas are realities in other first world countries, we spout “they cannot work here”.  That is true, they cannot work here AND retain our current paradigms and associated systems.  Those countries have different operating paradigms and it is serving their people. This country is also not ready for a female leader, the masculine is still out of balance (500 years of patriarchy will do that).  Hillary has her own unhealthy masculine side and it serves as a mirror to others with the same unhealthy masculine, so they “hate” her.  They cannot even see the real her. You know that is true when you can hate her like some hate Donald. They are apples and oranges. And Ted and Rubio are just slick versions of the holding on to the past and the way the game used to be played. We have turned our elections into a football game of winning strategies instead of a thoughtful process that finds, nurtures and selects a leader of a country.  Winning a football game is about game plans, money and the key players.  That is not what leading a country requires.

So, we are stuck with the mess we are all responsible for. And my hope is Donald and this process will unite the people.  Wake us up to the fact that this is not about abortion, gay rights, who gets to pick the next judge, privacy, terrorism on our soil (leave it to us to make 2 shootings by ethnic AMERICANS about the entire Muslim conflict and middle east, one paint brush stroke and we make everything about us, and as a result don’t have to do anything real at home).

Until we can see our truth, how others see us and embrace our shadows, get real and get involved, we will have more Donald’s running in all parts of government.  The power lies with the people, will we take it or give it up to the circus? The question is when, how much damage and suffering will it take to not only wake up, but to own our shadow as a country and actually be about the people.  The illusion we will lose quality of life is ignoring we already are.

Submit your Blame It, Name It, Change It

Blame it, name it and change it.  One of my pet peeves is double standards.   Often when I am triggered by someone else’s double standard it is because I have one going on myself in my inner world. What I am believing inside does not align with what I am saying or doing.  And oooh, do I hate it when others see it before me, that can set off a self loathing cycle if I let it.

As long as I am human I will have these moments I am not aligned – I almost look forward to them because now I understand that when I catch it early, I save myself and others, especially those I love, a mini series of drama and trauma.  That movie eventually shows me my own double standards.

The trick is to be able too see what is mine and what is not. There are indeed many people, institutions, families, cultures and such with double standards. And yes they need to get in alignment.  They do so as each individual within aligns themselves.  That can take decades or even death, especially for cultures and institutions.  We are seeing it today in health, food, environmental, economic and education systems.

When I am triggered by another’s double standard – go inward and ask what needs are not being met? What core values are being violated?  What beliefs are being challenged?  Where are you saying and doing something different?  Where do you need to get in alignment?  Alignment happens when you identify what you need to let go that is no longer serving you, when you upgrade, replace or transform a belief about yourself.  You own your story and your power.  Then, and only then can you return to the situation and be a resource to help the “other” transform.  You have done your work and are not making them about you.  Now you can see them for what and who they are or aren’t. It may be they don’t need to now (to make you feel better), or you chose not to be the change agent, bless them and let them learn in their time.  Let it go.

Name your pet peeve in a comment below!

Blame It: It is all over the press, blaming guns for killing innocent people, mass shootings, a significant difference of shooting deaths in America relative to other first world countries.  Get rid of guns get rid of violence.  Reduce guns, reduce mass shootings.  Guns don’t kill people, people kill people. People are to blame.  Inconsiderate, selfish, self righteous, self serving people, mentally ill people kill people with guns.

Claim It:  This is a symptom of the void inside us.  The result of being addicted to fear. Of believing in scarcity, that others must loose, be without, be held back, repressed, controlled, deprived, punished and treated as less than, in order for me to have, to win to be in abundance.  That we are not equal and must fear our differences rather than embrace, value and leverage them.  We use fear to keep our divisions and the illusion of retaining our power and kingdoms.  Our violence towards one another is a symptom we are separated from our truth that we are born to love each and value each other. Hate is taught and passed down.  That somehow this time, violence will restore centuries of in balance.

We as Americans, as humans collectively in this day and time, do not value human life, living organisms or our planet.  We have lost the connection between mother earth, our own selves and Spirit.  As such, we have more resources and power than ever, more capacity to love, heal, care and live in peace in a way that values and honors all living things than ever before.   Where our value and identity is a function of its contribution to the whole. Our survival depends on the survival of the whole tribe not just who I want.   There are individuals, some systems and paradigms that are living this way, but it is not the dominant paradigm, yet.

Change It:  One thought at a time, one action, one person can and does, every day make a difference.  I must be that person too.  I must awaken to where I am still believing and behaving in this way, ways I live my privilege that causes unnecessary repression and suffering for other living things, ways I can serve and give back, times when I need to question my thoughts or beliefs too.  I am not guilty of the violence that has come before me, but I have benefited from it.  Giving that voice, allowing anger, grief and saddness for others to heal, stops the denial, the cover up, the ignorance.  All this stops the pattern and creates space for something new.  One smile. Reaching across my comfort zone.  Give.  .  Where I am living my privilege and not giving back and  Claiming it means give it voice, go to the silence, the injustice and give it voice, take action where action is needed.

The need for guns to kill each other or to believe we need them to protect ourselves from ourselves, will only dissipate and disappear when we reclaim our inner divinity.  Restore our connection to the sacredness of life, all life. No sooner, no later, nothing less will do it either.   Love really is the answer and the question, when will we remember to love like we were born to love?

Submit your Blame It, Name It, Change It